


This Night Didn't Go To Plan

by Analinea, QueenOfTheCute



Series: Song fics [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Idiots in Love, Implied Casual Sex, M/M, Misunderstandings, Songfic, also angst and fluff, now including awesome comic in chapter 2, so no graphic smut, stay with me, team The Pleather Jackets, there a fade to black divergent style
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-08 19:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7770013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Analinea/pseuds/Analinea, https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenOfTheCute/pseuds/QueenOfTheCute
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's words that should be said, feelings that should be confessed, and a perfect morning just for that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [This Night Didn't Go To Plan (Эта ночь пошла не по плану)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14579643) by [FantikBantik](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantikBantik/pseuds/FantikBantik)



> Submission for the Sterek Summer Spectacle! Based on Stay With Me by Sam Smith (which I can't listen to anymore without yelling "STEREK")!
> 
> This is the time to thank all my team mates, because they are awesome <3

**01:13am**

It's dark outside.

Derek doesn't say anything to him, but Stiles is willing to find the invitation in his silence all the same. So, he stays where he is in bed, laying down and ready to sleep the rest of the night in the loft. Sure, he’ll take off before breakfast to avoid the awkwardness that comes from wanting more, but he’s still got a few hours until then. It's nice, laying next to Derek’s quiet warmth, exhausted but content.

Stiles looks at the ceiling, a small smile on his lips. He thinks about being back in town, finding his way to Derek again. He closes his eyes with a happy, sleepy sigh.

 

♦

 

Derek looks at Stiles laying next to him, at the sweat beaded at his hairline and how his chest is still heaving as he catches his breath. He thinks he could stay in that moment forever, look at him for all eternity and never be sick of it. He thinks he’d like to just stay here beside him for a long, long time.

He thinks about how he will find a cold spot next to him on the bed in the morning.

His chest hurts.

He doesn't want that. He doesn't want Stiles to leave. Not in the morning and not ever, if he’s being honest with himself.

They’re laying next to each other, close but not touching anymore. It would be so easy to link their hands together, wouldn’t it? To feel the press of Stiles’ palm against his; the grip of his long fingers threaded between Derek’s.

On an impulse, Derek raises his hand just a few inches off the bed, hovering closer, but not yet touching.

He hesitates.

Fear clenches his hand into a tight fist and disappointment washes over him in a familiar wave. He can't tell if it's because of the weakness that comes from giving into his feelings, or the fact that he won’t take action on them. The “what if” looms large in his mind, taunting him with disaster scenarios. What if he pushes too hard and loses this little bit of Stiles he has? What if Stiles looks at him with pity, embarrassed by Derek’s neediness? What if...

Derek rolls over, face falling into a comfortable frown. He buries the images, the thoughts that Stiles could return his feelings. He’s lucky enough to already have this. It’s too much to risk.

He closes his eyes. Soon enough, he’ll fall asleep and when he wakes up, his troubles will be gone.

Or, well, at least Stiles will be. The feelings will stay.

 

♦

 

This...thing. This thing they have, that Derek can't name, won't name, started a year ago. Right before summer started, he came back in town to a lot of changes. The Pack just graduated, at the exception of the youngest members. It was their last months together before scattering across the country to go to college.

Derek found them more mature than when he left: they all seemed taller, more confident. They looked happy to welcome him back, though sad to have such a short time to spend with him. So they made the best of it.

The first time he saw Stiles again, Derek lost his breath for a few seconds. He nearly forgot...

So this thing they have, it happened like most things do: unexpectedly and yet so naturally. Derek had spend his time away from Beacon Hills learning more about himself, about his new ability to turn into a wolf, making peace with his past.

Maybe that's why that first night, after everyone had gone home, after he opened the door again to find Stiles behind it, Derek had let himself be kissed. Maybe that's why he kissed back after years of growing feelings for this loyal, stubborn, assholish teen; years of staying away. He had enough. He wanted this.

In the morning, Derek hadn't known what to say. So many words whirling around in his head, and he couldn't get one out of his mouth. Couldn't even make sense of them. So he let Stiles go without a word.

That summer had been too short but passionate. Silent in a way that ironically bothered Derek, man of few words. It's not that they didn't talk; they even bickered and joked around. It's just that they only did so when the Pack was around; it's just that they left each other before the sun was out.

Still, Derek didn't know what they could tell each other. Stiles was about to leave for a new life, probably only wanted this temporarily. Just a way to get closure on this tension that had been present between them all this time. So Derek didn't say anything.

He's okay with all of this. Stiles will be back in a few days, after months of rare texts and not a single second of hearing his voice. Maybe they'll go back to their summer habits. Maybe Stiles will have found someone better during the year.

If it's the former, Derek is impatient to have his hands on the pale skin he dreamed of all year, discovering again every secrets of Stiles' body. If it's the latter, well, Derek will stay with those words that want to spill out of his mouth but can't, with the hurt in every silence. He's okay with it.

 

♦

 

**10:56pm**

Stiles is back. Stiles is back. Stiles is here, with Derek, and Derek's heart is beating so fast it might burst out of his chest. But Stiles can't hear that and Derek's glad. Or maybe he wishes the human could, because this simple rhythm seems to be able to express more than the words he can't say.

Stiles is against Derek, pushing him back toward the bed, kissing him. Stiles is warm, and beautiful, and everything Derek could want right now, right here. He can't stop his hands from drawings the contours of this body, remembering this weight, this presence. He almost can't believe Stiles is back. It feels like a dream.

Because Derek dreamed of this a lot: Stiles' frantic moves to undress Derek, Derek more precise but no slower to do the same. Breaking apart for a second to take off their shirts, panting, wanting and needing, and then finding the other's mouth again. Derek thinks they're made for this: being together. He doesn't add _ like this _ because he starts to understand that he wants them to be made for being together in every other way too.

He would like to be stronger and confess his feelings to Stiles. Not be so afraid that the man doesn't want him back in that same complete way. Derek wants to be stronger and stop doing this, these one night stands, because he wants more. But he needs this. If he can only ever have this, he'll take it. It makes the hurt a little less sharp where it's embedded in his chest.

They fall into bed. Pause for a second. Derek looks at Stiles, looks at him and hopes his eyes don't betray how much he...loves. Stiles.

 

♦

 

When Derek was a kid...oh, well, he really doesn't want to think about it. Sometimes, he tries to imagine another childhood, but it never works because it's not who he is. He's someone that lives in the present and keeps moving, he doesn't dwell on the past and what little thing done differently could have changed everything.

He can't picture a life where he's not a werewolf because he doesn't really know what it's like. Sure, he had this weird time when he became human, but a few days without super healing and strength probably doesn't start to cover the everyday little things like…like a paper cut.

He saw Stiles have one, once. Hell, he saw that human with bruises on his face, blood on his knuckles, just out of being possessed, but he never complained as much as that time he cut his finger with an envelope.

Derek can't picture a life where he never fell for Paige, killed her, met Kate, got his family burned alive because of hi- her. Because of her. It's just that...it's the way things are, have been. There's not parallel universe where this didn't happen, or if there is it's not _ his _ .

But somehow what he can bring to life in his mind is Stiles, standing in front of him and smiling. They're both a bit younger, a bit less damaged, and when they kiss...it's full of every silence Derek should have filled.  

 

♦

 

**5:32am**

Their bodies relax during the night, going from rigid to pliant. Derek doesn't move a lot in his sleep, but Stiles has a tendency to flail that he never lost from childhood. He moves, moves again. Turns over, his arm following in a wide arc that ends with a loud smack on Derek's torso.

Neither of them wake up. Maybe it's a testimony of how much they trust each other, that they're not immediately awake and alert, even when all these years around danger made them hypervigilant.

Instead, Derek sighs, grumbles a bit. Scoots over until he's pressed against Stiles warmth, and curls his arm around the human's ribs. Stiles grunts a bit, but with a small sleepy smile adjusts his position to wrap his arm around Derek's back.

 

♦

 

Derek sat at his back porch once, thinking, drowning out the sounds of the Pack roaming around in his burned out house. They were trying to see if they could salvage some things, maybe try to rebuild a little using the skeleton of this old life that Derek let himself think about more and more.

It was sometimes between...when was it? A week of peace maybe, but he wouldn't be able to say when, or who was still alive then. It was way before Derek and Stiles started their...thing.

The squealing was recognizable as the left shoe of one of Stiles’ pair, the one he always wore when he knew he'll get them dirty. The teen sat beside Derek and stayed silent for a while. It's something not most people were aware of, that Stiles can stay silent, that rambling is not his default mode. Derek takes pride in being in the know, one of the few chosen to witness this side of Stiles.

They stayed like that a few minutes. Eventually, Derek relaxed his hand enough to give Stiles what was in it.

It was a photograph. Derek had almost the same one in his wallet, taken the same day, colors faded out where this one had burned edges and a water stain in the upper left corner. The whole family together in their garden, happy. Stiles went to give it back after studying it, but Derek shook his head. Wondered what the teen had seen in it.

He felt Stiles move, heard the rustling of fabric, and next thing he knew there was a folded photograph in his hand. The human was gone before Derek even got it open: a picture of the Stilinskis, all three of them at the beach, happy. Stiles' mom, flowing brown hair in the wind under a straw hat, vibrant and so painfully alive

Derek still doesn't know what this moment meant, what this exchange was. He doesn't know if Stiles still has the Hale family photo, just that his own wallet has immortalized brighter days in it. He wants to think that this past silence echoed all the words he needs to say to Stiles. It's wishful thinking, he knows, so he tries to forget the warm feeling it left behind.

 

♦

 

**1:14am**

Stiles hears Derek turning, feels the sheet moving. He opens his heavy eyelids and turns his head. He can't help the disappointed twisting of his face or the way he quickly looks away again when he sees Derek with his back turned to him, putting as much distance between them as possible. The human can't help the hurt, the stabbing feeling in his chest that makes it hard to breathe.

He almost leaves, then. Maybe he misunderstood Derek, and the man really wants him gone as soon as they're done.

Stiles swallows around the lump in his throat, resolves himself to stay. He'll even be brave enough to face the silence and stay for breakfast this time. He dreamed of it all year, after all, barely able to stop himself from calling Derek everyday.

He turns to his side, mirroring Derek. It's time they stopped this: Stiles wants, needs more than these nights, has for a long time now. Before it even started. But the other never seemed to feel the same way so Stiles kept silent.

He just can't face the possibility of being rejected after confessing his feelings. Dismissed with only a huff and a...turn of Derek's back. He'd rather have nothing than keep this up.

Stiles closes his eyes. He knows he'll fall asleep despite the heavy weight in his heart. He's had plenty of practice in the last year anyway.

 

♦

 

Stiles can't count the number of times he thought _ this is it, I'm going to tell him now _ . It's like trying to count the annoyed glares Lydia sent his way in the last few years. It's like...it's like trying to count all the stupid bets he's made with Scott in the last...forever.

He almost lost one, once, and he'll never forget the relief of not having to go up to Derek with pink heart sunglasses and a lame pick-up line. Scott is not stupid so he always knew about Stiles feeling for the brooding werewolf, and he probably knows all about their...um...affair, in the summer. But whoever he fooled with his True Alpha thing, he can be really mischievous when he wants. Not all of their pranks were Stiles' ideas, even if people would never believe it.

So, Stiles really stopped counting at some point. He tried to stay himself when they saw each other in the Pack's presence; then he would stay quiet about his feeling and take whatever Derek would give him. When he went to kiss him the first time, he was surprised to have it reciprocated. It was a chance he wasn't ready to take again with a _ love confession _ .

But just as he’s about to open the loft door without knocking, he thinks _ this is it _ , and he means it. It's just that, he meant it all the other times too. It's just that, he wants to have Derek like this one last time if his words will mean that he can never have him ever again. 

It's harder than ever, not to let “I love you”s spill from his mouth between kisses. He just has to wait a little longer. Then he'll feel brave, weak, strong, tired enough to say it. And risk losing everything.

 

♦

 

**7:57am**

The morning sun doesn't wake them up. There's the sound of light snoring, and in the golden light they're still wrapped around each other. It's the perfect opposite of the way they fell asleep in the cold night light. It feels like a perfect morning for the right words to be said.


	2. Stay With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Come vote for us ;) kudos and comments would also be so great we'll love you forever <3  
> Chapter 2 is the amazing comic by my awesome collab, go and give her all the love she deserves in the comments :)
> 
> **EDIT:** fixed the comic problem AND is 10 months a long time to forget to put the tumblr link in the fic? Who knows, not me haha here it is [[x]](http://sterekshelter.tumblr.com/post/149000160070/this-night-didnt-go-to-plan-sterek-summer)


End file.
